My New House

I’ve been living in suspension, in limbo with my house build, with intermittent irritation, some days bordering on sadness. So damn much waiting. Waiting, patience has never been my forte. I expected I’d develop patience after retiring, but alas, I am the same person I’ve alwys been. It’s exactly a year since I signed with the developer, ten months since mortgage approval. It feels longer.

The feeling of time being suspended has been exasperated by my low enegy level. I haven’t felt normal since I had covid 16 months ago. It contributes to a general feelig of malisse.

Added to that was an interim move. My Florida moving and storage company, closed the facility storing my wordly possessions. They gave me two weeks to move my goods. Exasperating as they insisted on payment in cash or PO money order. My nearest Chase bank is in Greenville, 90 minutes away. And to top it off they charged me $2000 for the moving blanets protectng my furniture. Highway robbery on top of horrible service.

The interim move is done. My condo in North Carolina sold and closed. And I’m taking bio identical hormones that have given me a surge of energy. And the house is finished!

But hindrances continue. My checking account was hacked. I had seven transactions to an unknown Venmo account. The only time I shared my routing/account information was for my condo closing, to the law firm handling the closing.

So another trip to Greenville to close the account, open a new one. Chase was helpful, I got my money back immediately. But then I had to make several phone calls to my direct monthly depositors with my new accout information. All amidst packing up the condo.

It has surely sucked the joy and anticipation out of this experience.

But I do absolutely love my new house. And I am turning my attention and energy into the final move.

The only time I’ve moved into a brand new house was our move to Wiesbaden Germany for my assignment with Opel. But it wasn’t ‘our’ house, it was a rented house. So this is very different. Every decision was mine.

Along the way I worried that things would not blend together, as most decisions are made with different suppliers, at different times. But the whole is beautiful and harmonious.

The landscaping of course is my forte and I’ve enjoyed picking out the foundational plantings. The builder’s landscaping guy told my nursery owner that I’m the only one who has picked out my own plants. The other owners let him pick out the plants, plant them and the owners are esssentially oblivious.

The exterior of the house is blue, a real blue, Craftsman blue that my son Tristn picked out. The other houses are all white, pale grey or beige. My house stands out, makes statement, does not blend in.

My new neighbors have the impression that I’m artistic. Not true. Bob had the interior design sense, he was once engaged to an interior designer. Any artistic sense I have is in gardening. I’m looking forward to unpacking my 15 large ceramic pots and situating them on my 42 foot side porch.

It is finally happening. I’ve moved out of the condo and I’m in a VRBO for two weeks before my move in. A few days to catch my breath. I can walk into town. To sooth my sore muscles and calm the craziness in my head. To be ready for the real work of getting settled into the new house.

It’s now three and a half years since I lost Bob. The pain of that loss is less raw. I think of him every day. And I miss him, but now without so much anguish. Mostly I think of our 45 years together and how lucky I was.

I feel proud of what I’ve done. Moved to a new state, made new friends, found my place.

And now the next chapter begins in earnest. Hopefully it’s a bit like childbirth. Once you have it, the pain fades into a distant memory.